"Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." -Kate Moss

I guess as a born and raised Michigander, this shouldn't surprise me a whole lot... BUT we woke up to snow Monday. Snow. Obviously Spring isn't exactly on its way, but nonetheless, bathing suit season is soon approaching. Eww. God knows my sweatpant wearing physique trembles at this very thought. Besides lacking total self control when it comes to eating (especially sweets) and would rather punch myself in the face than exercise, I also am an unfortunate sufferer of seasonal depression. Winter = cold and darkness = over eating and zero physical activity.

Note: I've had the copy below saved in my drafts for several months now debating whether or not to make it public. My weight/body is a very sensitive subject for me. I know there are people out there (my husband included) who can't understand why it's so hard to have self control and therefore don't understand the frustration of dieting and watching your weight. However, I also know that there are so many people out there fighting the same battles I am and sometimes it helps just to know you're not alone. With that said...

I wish I weren't body conscious. I wish I was one of those girls who could embrace my double digit pant size and love all my jiggly-ness, but sadly, I'm not quite that strong. I saw a passage pop up in my Facebook mini-feed the other day that really reached out to me:

Tips on how to battle negative body image issues:

• Don’t let others be your mirror unless they are a positive one. 
• Find what you like about your body and play it up. 
• Spend time admiring things about yourself in the mirror and in pictures. 
• Do things that make you feel beautiful. 
• Protect yourself from toxic people who belittle your beauty. 
• Avoid comparing bodies. 
• Relearn to love yourself. 
• Participate in things that make you feel good about your body. 
• Discover your style and appreciate it. 
• If you can’t find yourself, reinvent yourself. 

Well, I'm hoping one day to find a balance of eating what I love combined with portion control and frequent exercise. Right now, I need to get my ass in gear because I'm not happy with what I see in the mirror. I have my workout clothes packed and ready to go for after work today. I think it's also time to dig out my before and after pictures (below) in order to get myself motivated again. May as well super glue them on the back of my hands as a constant reminder when I reach for food. Pictures don't lie... and the ones taken of me in Hawaii in 2009 are no exception. Knowing I had a wedding and honeymoon coming up in 11 months was enough to scare me into diet and exercise. I had Clay take an "after" photo of me on the first day of our honeymoon. Although disgusted with my before photo, I'm thankful for this reminder.

August 2009 to July 2010: Front

August 2009 to July 2010: Back

I pray for motivation, strength and success as I attempt to improve my actions and feelings toward exercising, eating and body image. Self-discipline and self-control will also be added to the self-improvement list.  I wish I still lived with my mom, but we will have to learn how to be long distant workout buddies and hold each other accountable for what we eat and the exercise we should be doing.

If anyone out there is looking to be healthier and lose/watch their weight, I strongly recommend MyFitnessPal.com. Easy and free site to help track food and exercise... almost like a fitness facebook. Try it out... and be my friend (username AndreaArchambault). Well friends, wish me luck.